Collaborative Problem Solving (CPS) Training
Across Ottawa, the Growing Up Safe partners are working together to strengthen how we support children and families who have experienced gender-based violence. A central goal of the initiative is to build shared capacity across Crossroads and the partner shelters through coordinated training and cross-training. As part of this effort, Crossroads recently organized a Collaborative Problem Solving (CPS) training so shelter staff could deepen their understanding of one of the core approaches we use with children and caregivers. The session offered a practical way for teams to learn from one another and reinforce a more consistent, supportive experience for families across all sites.
Children show us every day how capable and resilient they are. Yet when a child struggles with big emotions or challenging behaviour, it can be difficult to understand what they need in that moment. The CPS training offered a compassionate, practical way to look beneath the behaviour and support children through their hardest moments. Rooted in both research and real-world experience, the model encourages adults to foster emotional growth, strengthen relationships, and create calmer, more connected environments.
Kids Do Well If They Can
At the heart of CPS is a simple belief: kids do well if they can. When children feel overwhelmed or unable to meet expectations, the issue is often not motivation but a skill that hasn’t fully developed. Instead of asking, “Why won’t they behave?” CPS invites us to consider, “What skills might they be struggling with?” This shift encourages adults to see behaviour as information rather than misconduct.
Throughout the training, we explored how everyday challenges such as arguing, withdrawing, refusing tasks, or becoming upset often stem from lagging skills in areas like frustration tolerance, emotional regulation, language processing, or flexibility. By looking beneath the behaviour, CPS helps us understand what a child is experiencing and how we can support them more effectively.
Connection Through Empathy & Curiosity
A core part of CPS is building connection through empathy and curiosity. The approach reminds us to slow down, listen closely, and make room for a child’s point of view. When children feel understood, it becomes easier to work together on solutions. This aligns closely with the focus of Growing Up Safe: creating emotionally safe environments where children and families can build trust and experience support that feels respectful and predictable.
Growth Happens Through Relationships
The model also emphasizes the value of proactive conversations. Instead of waiting for conflict to arise, adults and children talk through challenges in calmer moments. This helps identify what feels hard, share concerns honestly, and explore options together. These conversations encourage children to take part in shaping solutions, building confidence and developing skills they can draw on throughout their lives.
CPS connects naturally with the broader work happening across teams in trauma-informed care, attachment-based practice, and emotional skill-building. Whether through collaborative problem solving, therapeutic supports, or caregiver coaching, the shared goal is to help children feel understood, supported, and equipped to meet challenges with resilience.
This training underscored something central to our work: growth happens through relationships—between children and caregivers, between families and support teams, and across the partner agencies working together in Growing Up Safe. When we see behaviour differently, we can respond differently. And when we respond differently, we create the conditions for children to show just how capable they truly are.